University of Helsinki
What keeps a person attached to this world? Personally, I believe it is other people, attachment to them, and a sense of being cared for, as we are. In addition to me being important to other people, they are also important to me.
In the context of parenting, caring means that each child is valued by the parent or other carer as themselves, and as they are. Caring is daily nurturing and affection, affirmed by verbal communication of how important the other person is. This facilitates a sense of being significant to the other, attachment, and mutual love.
In addition to attachment, caring means setting limits, which the adult uses to protect the child. Limits constitute an investment in the child’s future. As one young person recovering from drug abuse remarked, as a child they did not know that caring did not mean having permission to do absolutely anything.
There is good reason to keep talking about love and limits.
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